Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time
Based on the video game, which follows an adventurous prince who teams up with a rival princess to stop an angry ruler from unleashing a sandstorm that could destroy the world.
"Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time" is another disappointing game adaptation with an underwhelming story and clunky CGI. The action is good but the editing is brash, and its over-reliance on special effects is a curse, despite the brief moments it's actually of valuable consequence. Naturally there are nods to its origins, but they didn't need to bring back the two-dimensional characters. The hourglass just doesn't run out quick enough on this one.
A Nightmare on Elm Street
A re-imagining of the horror icon Freddy Krueger, a serial-killer who wields a glove with four blades embedded in the fingers and kills people in their dreams, resulting in their real death in reality.
Without an introduction, "A Nightmare on Elm Street" is terribly confusing. Some cool transitional effects blur the real and dream worlds: Freddy appears loudly, he cuts, blood is spilled... and the kids die in an amusing fashion. The result isn't very good, as too much tension is drawn from sound and not setup. Despite many micro-lapses, it does its best to keep you alive till the very end, and it eventually starts to make a little sense. It's difficult to stay awake during this deeply inferior remake.
I Love You Too
All that is standing between them is four little words.
This movie plays as a series of barely funny comedy sketches staged atop an underdeveloped script. Situations set up to amuse fail to elicit a even a guffaw. "I Love You Too" struggles to establish credibility in the characters, painting them as shallow stereotypical caricatures. Without on-screen chemistry between the romantic leads, any rom com is a labour of love to endure; add sexism, age-ism, a fat joke and it’s all a bit icky. It's hard to imagine an audience unsophisticated enough to appreciate the crass tone, many will not love this.
The Eclipse
In a seaside Irish town, a widower sparks with a visiting horror novelist while he also begins to believe he is seeing ghosts.
There's a dose of horror, a hint of romance, a touch of drama, some grieving, and a lot of mystery as we wonder where the plot of this film went. "The Eclipse" begs for a stronger narrative thread as the story plays out as a mish-mash of underdeveloped elements. The moody and uneven Irish coast is scenically captured as a backdrop, however moody and uneven are only gratifying when delivered by nature, not the director. An eclipse of coherence.
Date Night
In New York City, a case of mistaken identity turns a bored married couple's attempt at a glamorous and romantic evening into something more thrilling and dangerous.
With its highly talented stars and strong supporting cast, this movie should have been a sure thing. What a disappointment that it's barely funny, and even worse, actually quite boring. The staging and script are clumsy, trying way too hard to garner laughs. Somehow nothing seems to click, and you just end up feeling uncomfortable watching so much effort for so little return. Like a bad date, "Date Night" makes you wish you'd opted for a quiet night in.
The Last Song
A rebellious girl is sent to a Southern beach town for the summer to stay with her father.
"The Last Song" was specifically created as a vehicle for its female lead to make the shift to more adult dramatic roles, but regrettably it won't help her career as much as she may have hoped. The movie is everything you'd expect – a cheesy, schmaltzy tear-jerker. While the young stars do their best to provide some sense of authenticity to their roles, the overwrought, overloaded and implausible plot make it very hard work for cast and viewer alike. It almost certainly won't be the amiable young star's last song, but sadly isn't her best.
Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant
A teenage boy unknowingly breaks a 200-year-old truce between two warring factions of vampires.
This film has all the right ingredients but never quite lives up to its initial promise. There is great potential in the colourful and quirky characters, but due to a slow and drawn-out plot, they never really get fleshed out. Lying somewhere between comedy and pre-teen horror, there just aren't enough laughs or scares to succeed in either genre. As the title clearly suggests, this film is designed to be the first of a franchise, but for a film about vampires and circus freaks, it just doesn't have enough bite to keep you hooked.
2012
An epic adventure about a global cataclysm that brings an end to the world.
For the most part, "2012" requires you to be strapped in as you are overwhelmed by loud noises and CGI carnage. But what little joy there is to savour in the crumbling of national monuments is quickly lost in the cracks of boredom. There are only so many times a plane can out-run impending destruction before a plot becomes anymore predictable, while we look at our watches and wonder why oh why is it taking so long for the world to end? Yet another disappointment from a director of disasters.
The Box
A small wooden box arrives on the doorstep of a married couple, who know that opening it will grant them a million dollars and kill someone they don't know.
Based on a short-story, this creepy film doesn't live up to its promising premise. A lot of weird stuff happens - blood noses, gateways, lightening and other unintentionally funny moments of suspense. The score is atmospheric, performances solid, but intriguing questions of morality are lost in the frustratingly ponderous revelations. The lesson here is to stay at home in your box, perhaps watch the box, and avoid the confusion that is "The Box".
Fame
An updated version of the 1980 musical, centered on students of the NY Academy of Performing Arts.
The grit, heartbreak, passion and talent of the characters was the heart of the ground-breaking original movie. These elements are absent in this 'reinvention'. It is bland and soul-less, two things a film about performing arts should never be. Clearly aimed at the MTV audience, this is a sequence of performance numbers interrupted by inconsequential plot, rather than a character study in the lives of extraordinarily talented students desperate for success. More sparkler than flame, this "Fame" bungles its audition.
Imagine That
A financial executive who can't stop his career downspiral is invited into his daughter's imaginary world, where solutions to his problems await.
"Imagine That" is a confused family offering, where on one hand the setting is an industry probably incomprehensible to children, and on the other is humour that is juvenile, unlikely to amuse older audience members. Mediocre on many fronts, yet incredible too, as no special effects are used in a film where an imaginary world is a major plot feature. Some movies made for the big screen go straight to a DVD release, imagine that.
Taking Woodstock
A man working at his parents' motel in the Catskills inadvertently sets in motion the generation-defining concert in the summer of 1969.
"Taking Woodstock" presents a curious perspective of the legendary festival, whose sheer logistics provide more interest than anything else. The story centres on Elliot, as we watch him break free from his parents to co-ordinate a festival for thousands of hippies. While the film captures the culture of the time, it unfortunately shuns the music, meaning most will come away feeling less than "high". Take away the bright colours, and you have a dull film.
The Man Who Came With The Snow
A man enters a bar, sits and observes, not speaking. Gradually, the silent presence of the stranger disturbs the other customers.
This bleak film, set in Tajikistan, begins as a tableau, monochromatic but for the violent splashes of red placed artfully throughout. In stark contrast, the snow and wind rage outside, the elements as harsh as life in this place. While an interesting study in the power of stillness, this film never engages the viewer. Perhaps the severity of the setting defines it too strongly... there is just no warmth to be found.
My Life in Ruins
A travel guide rediscovers her romantic side when she takes a tour group on a trip around Greece.
"My Life in Ruins" is a flamboyant, sugar-sweet romantic comedy set along the tourist trail of Greece and it's islands. With its one-dimensional leading lady and characters so stereotyped they are virtually caricature, this cloyingly sentimental movie is only moderately enjoyable. As it takes you on its plodding and predictable bus ride towards 'true love', the film's spectacular scenery overwhelms the naive and formulaic plot. For something syrupy and Greek, I would recommend a piece of Baklava instead.
- Genre » Comedy
- Festival » Greek Film Festival 2009
Winged Creatures
A group of strangers form a unique relationship with each other after surviving a random shooting.
Normality is shattered by a horrific event and the characters fall apart in ways that beggar belief. Truth is reportedly stranger than fiction, and in this instance the clumsy storylines drawn out of the central trauma have little semblance to possible truth. PTSD reactions should be left to psychologists not scriptwriters. This is as downbeat a movie as you're ever likely to see, and all the more irksome for the condescending portrayals of the working class characters. Fly away.